2018 New Years Resolution, compete in a bodybuilding competition! (OMG girl, what is wrong with you?? Why??) It was a challenge so big, it frightened me, and that excited me. I was yearning for something physically demanding to catapult my fitness journey. I coached myself, researched everything online, and worked on a plan. So it began… the 6 day a week workouts, meticulous attention to every gram of food I ingested, a fierce determination to step on stage in a bikini and clear heels. *Gasp, what would people think?* I was in my own world, I blocked out all the noise, patched up the pain, sleepy was my constant mood, but my gear was on autopilot. 5 months of torture, day in and day out, thoughts of giving up, feelings of shame, mixed with flickers of hope, and pride.
Slowly, I began to open up about my journey and document my progress, my blooming was televised (on IG). A metamorphis was happening, as I dropped the lbs, I also released my grip on fear. Fear is a weird emotion, in that, it’s a negative feeling , but it is also very comfortable. It keeps you in the sweet spot, provides security, but honestly it’s debilitating. “What is on the other side of fear?” I had to push past my self-doubt to be my own cheerleader and muster the courage to push myself physically and mentally. Oh the pain, oh the suffering!! But it was a beautiful experience, and I am forever changed! What I now know for sure (shout out to Oprah!) is that I can achieve anything that I set my mind upon. That the possibilities are endless, I can be a bodybuilder, and a corporate manager, and much more, I can do it all. There are no rules to life, I’m not following a pre-written script, I’m writing my own story, organically, from the soul.
It is December 31, 2018, looking back at 2018, I am so proud of so myself! You go girl! My 2019 New Years Resoultion, is to start a blog and to share my passion of health and wellness! Voila! I am excited for this new journey, just writing these few posts have made me immensely happy, and I hope it sparks a metamorphosis in someone!! To happiness that knows no bounds….